FEMA holds a fake press conference.

Family First candidate Andrew Quah ousted after photos of him nude were emailed around. Says Quah: “I might have been drunk off my face or my political enemies might have drugged me.” Uh huh.

Cashier tells armed robber she’s too busy to deal with him. (Thanks Marie)

Mythbusters is at a nuclear power plant for a future episode: do cockroaches survive a nuclear blast? (Thanks Deb)

Rugby chief resigns after complaints he was drunk at a function… the complaint coming from sponsor Bundaberg Rum. (Thanks David)

Oh, humanity, has it come to this? Drunken men trespassing on an ostrich farm gun down one of the birds after getting kicked by it.

Classy. “The decorum in the Ipswich Magistrate’s call-over court was shattered as the sound of a woman experiencing heightened sexual pleasure rang out for between 10 to 20 seconds.”

Greenpeace says: eat more kangaroos!.

How do you stop speeding? Make out speedsters have small penises.

Cow arrested after causing traffic accidents. (Thanks Marie)

The big heist! $250,000 worth of disposable nappies. (Thanks David)

When comedy goes wrong: A plot line in Summer Heights High poking fun at a student called Annabel who died of a drug overdose has parallels with a woman called Annabel who also died of a drug overdose, just days after filming was completed.

Beach screening of the Rugby League Grand Final was missing just one thing: the big TV.

Do we really believe this one? 13-year-old boy survives a two-hour flight hanging onto a plane wing. (Thanks Bob)