Greenpeace fined after its Rainbow Warrior ship damages a coral reef. Oops. (Via Polly)

According to his psychoanalyst, former French president Francois Mitterand was forced to hand over codes to disable Argentina’s French-made missiles by Margaret Thatcher, who threatened to nuke Buenos Aires. (Thanks Amanda)

A woman tried to open the door and nip outside for a cigarette. Unfortunately at the time she was on a Cathay Pacific flight from Hong Kong to Australia. (Thanks MGS)

Sunny, the embarrassing swearing “arse!” “bollocks!” Navy parrot, has been ordered to shore. Not for swearing at the admiralty this time, but for health reasons.

IT workers are the worst-dressed.

Bloke caught and fined for driving drunk and while his licence suspended. His passenger prepares to drive him home, but is then stopped for the same thing. They ring the bloke’s girlfriend, who turns up to drive them home. Turns out she’s drunk as well. All three charged.

Political correctness reversed: the Victorian state government rules Santa is allowed in school Christmas celebrations.

Zoom… flash! What was that? U-turn, drive back… flash! Huh? A man loses his licence after driving past a speed camera four times, wondering what it was and why it kept flashing at him. Apart from speeding past the camera, he was also not wearing a seatbelt. (Thanks Jessica)

Dutch authorities investigate sparrow shot with an air rifle, apparently because it knocked over twenty-three thousand dominoes being prepared for a world record attempt. (Thanks MGS)

Legendary DJ John Peel had more than 100,000 discs in total. But in a single box, prepared for easy evacuation in case of fire, were packed 142 of his all-time favourite singles, “featuring Status Quo, Sheena Easton (twice) and Bill Oddie. Bill Oddie?”

A teenage protestor takes advantage of a government website that would happily courier up to 99 brochures about the much-debated industrial relations reforms. He has 5000 sent to various fictional addresses, including the Curry Lovers Society, Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Indonesian Pandas, and the Porn Lovers’ Guide to Australia. (Thanks FoxHow)

But hey, that’s nothing compared to the half a million brochures pulped by the government to insert the word “fairer” on the front cover.

Retired Elvis impersonator helps nab Elvis memorabilia thief. (Thanks Amanda)

Traditional Thai wedding ceremony… for two pandas. (Thanks MGS)

Norwegian toddler’s toilet-training set back when a carnivorous lizard comes out of the toilet. (Thanks Amanda)

Japanese advertising people give Ronald McDonald a makeover… into Ronette… (Thanks Pratap)